Monthly Archives: August 2009

RECIPE FOR HEALING A BROKEN HEART

Love Puzzle   (c) Katy Allgeyer

Love Puzzle (c) Katy Allgeyer

I recently read the “Heartbroken OW” blog and decided I needed to post my recipe for healing a broken heart today.

You’ve heard the expression “love sickness”? The term goes back a long way and many greater writers than I (Shakespeare comes to mind) have covered the symptoms brilliantly. It hits most of us at some stage of life and it can be difficult to shake it off. People can carry the attachment to the wrong person for years and years. It can be crippling to men or women who never seem to be available emotionally when they finally meet a potential new lover.

Some feng shui tips to help you detach (and you MUST detach if you are ever going to make room for a new, healthy lover):

*Take inventory of any gifts he/she gave you, photos of your lover or the two of you together, letters, emails, etc and eliminate them from your life. You can do this by tossing them in the garbage, OR you can ritualize it by burning them in a fireplace or bonfire. Say out loud as you let go of these items that remind you constantly of your lover/the affair: “I let go of (lover’s name) with love as I no longer need (his name) or any reminder of (lover’s name) in my life. I banish all negative energy and make space for a new healthy love to come into my life.”

*Sell off engagement rings or valuables and give the money to charity or to your parents.

* If you have sheets and bedding that you used together with your ex, eliminate them—-give to a pet shelter. They reuse them for pets. Buy a new set. Of course, ultimately if you could afford it, would be a good idea to also get rid of the mattress but if not possible financially you can just smudge your bed real good (see below).

* Smudge yourself and your home with sage or with incense. Waft it all around the space and say “I banish all energy that does not belong to me (and if you have a pet, include them as their energy does belong with you) and I reclaim my space for me (and my pet)!” You will want to do this throughout your home and repeat it nine days in a row and once a week or once a month thereafter. Notice how you feel when all his/her energy is cleared away.

*You may have to cut the invisible cord that is attached to your solar plexus (your energy lines to him/her and his/hers to yours). To do this, you’ll want to consciously be willing to let go, and say out loud that you are cutting all cords to (his or her name) and make a scissoring motion over your middle torso with your hands or with a real scissors, envisioning all cords being cut. They may reattach so you may have to repeat this process several times over a span of time in order for you to be clear of your ex.

*Now this part is difficult but I’ve been there myself and I know you can do it when you are ready: do NOT answer his/her calls, emails, letters etc. Put a block on his/her emails (or have them auto dumped into your trash folder so you don’t even know when he/she has contacted you), block him/her from your facebook etc pages, just DETACH, DISENGAGE, MOVE ON.

*And do not initiate contact with the exlover either. RESIST the urge to reach out when something great happens in your life or sharing when someone in your life dies or calling to tell your ex that you saw so & so and they said to say hi. Etc, etc. etc. Do not look for a reason to make contact.

*Get a pet if you don’t have one. Animals love us unconditionally. There is no better remedy for loneliness and depression than a dog or cat snuggling next to you. Rescue a pet today!

Time does give you new perspective. The recipe above is if you truly want to heal your broken heart and move on. Be gentle with yourself and take it one step at a time. Good luck!

11 Comments

Filed under Healing Energy, Love & Relationship, Qi, Self Help

OFF THE WALL PAPER, Part II

Pink Ballerina

Isn’t this lovely for a little girl’s room?
Bunnies & Kittens & Bears, Oh my!

And this slightly scary bunny on the donkey would be cool in our guest bathroom…
The Pony League

But if I had a little boy, I’d splurge on ‘The Pony League’ wallpaper and read him bedtime stories about The Babe and Reggie Jackson.

More vintage wallpapers to go ga-ga for at Rosie’s Vintage Wallpaper. She’s got 50,000 rolls, 50!

1 Comment

Filed under Creativity & Future Projects, Design, Feng Shui Home, Fun, Interior Design

ARTISTS HELPING FORESTS

"Summer 2009" Katy Allgeyer Mixed Media on Hubcap
Ken Marquis, founder of the Landfill Art Project sent me an invitation to participate in his artist reclamation venture. I accepted and a few days later a box arrived with a sandblasted hubcap in it. It was a challenge to apply my mixed media maps and acrylics to this slick surface. The project is going to raise both awareness and funds for reforestation through a traveling exhibition and book. I don’t know if my work will be one of the 200 international artists’ work chosen for these, but it was definitely a fun and worthy cause.

1 Comment

Filed under ART, Fun, Giveaway

SOUNDS GOOD TO ME

Unknown photographer: thank you!

Unknown photographer: thank you!

How important is sound to feng shui? Very. We often use “sound cures” to chase away bad Qi vibes in clearing spaces. Tibetan prayer bells work well for this sort of thing. You might have unpleasant sounds and noises in your home. Ticking clocks, appliances, close proximity to traffic…anything that grates on your nerves is going to have a negative affect. If you cannot remove the source, you can counterbalance it with soothing sounds such as adding music, water features, or ‘white noise’.

1 Comment

Filed under Feng Shui, Getting Organized, Qi

MANIFESTING YOUR INTENTIONS

This excerpt from todays NYT Magazine article “The Women’s Crusade” (Nicholas Kristof & Sheryl WuDunn) is unintentionally a brilliant description of how setting intentions (here they are called “goals”) is a very powerful feng shui tool we can all use. It’s the story of Tererai, a woman in Africa who showed high academic promise as a child but was actively prevented from going to school because of her gender and was instead married off and turned into a goatherder.

Excerpt:
“Tererai timidly voiced hope of getting an education. Luck pounced and told her that she could do it, that she should write down her goals and methodically pursue them. After Luck and her entourage disappeared, Tererai began to study on her own, in hiding from her husband, while raising her five children. Painstakingly, with the help of friends, she wrote down her goals on a piece of paper: “One day I will go to the United States of America,” she began, for Goal 1. She added that she would earn a college degree, a master’s degree and a Ph.D. — all exquisitely absurd dreams for a married cattle herder in Zimbabwe who had less than one year’s formal education. But Tererai took the piece of paper and folded it inside three layers of plastic to protect it, and then placed it in an old can. She buried the can under a rock where she herded cattle.

Then Tererai took correspondence classes and began saving money. Her self-confidence grew as she did brilliantly in her studies, and she became a community organizer for Heifer. She stunned everyone with superb schoolwork, and the Heifer aid workers encouraged her to think that she could study in America. One day in 1998, she received notice that she had been admitted to Oklahoma State University.

Some of the neighbors thought that a woman should focus on educating her children, not herself. “I can’t talk about my children’s education when I’m not educated myself,” Tererai responded. “If I educate myself, then I can educate my children.” So she climbed into an airplane and flew to America.

At Oklahoma State, Tererai took every credit she could and worked nights to make money. She earned her undergraduate degree, brought her five children to America and started her master’s, then returned to her village. She dug up the tin can under the rock and took out the paper on which she had scribbled her goals. She put check marks beside the goals she had fulfilled and buried the tin can again.”

What intentions would you put in your tin can? Write them down today. Adding Action to Intention = Manifestation and Success.

2 Comments

Filed under Creativity & Future Projects, Feng Shui, Self Help

BEST MACAROONS EVER

I’m tempted to give up my recipe for coconut macaroons here on my blog. But only if there’s genuine interest…I’m thinking at least 99 people otherwise I’m not sharing. Yes, I’m one of those kinds of people. Sorry. Weigh in now with your vote on my poll (weighing in after eating is your own business). Check in later to see if I posted my recipe (or post your own recipes here).

4 Comments

Filed under Creativity & Future Projects, Fun, Health & Fitness

BACK TO THE LAND: DEER ISLE HOSTEL

Yesterday my b.f. and I went to visit the Deer Isle Hostel. While we support the idea of back to the land sustainable living with low impact on the planet, we couldn’t believe that the accommodations being offered for $25 per person per night would be anything remotely cozy & comfortable. We were wrong.

Dennis Carter and his lovely companion Anneli Sundqvist have created a remarkable space. Reminiscent of a Shakespearean village building, the DIH building—handbuilt by master carpenter Dennis over a period of 3 years—is as charming a shelter as any you’ll find on the island. Exposed beams, wood floors…although it was 85 degrees the day we visited, the inside of the hostel was cooled naturally by the design of the building and its exposure to the sun.

While the outdoor composting john is rustic, it is also state-of-the-art and odor-free. The outdoor shower is a delightfully ingenious invention ( one preheats a watering can on the woodstove or in the sun, then hooks it up overhead).

The hostel is adjacent to the Edgar Tennis Preserve nature trail which is one of the most beautiful walks on the island.

Leave a comment

Filed under Architecture, Design, Feng Shui, Fun, Travel

FENG SHUI FOR AN ARTIST’S STUDIO

This is my art studio/gallery in Maine. Click on the link to see more photos.

We took the original 1929 garage and turned it into a working studio and art gallery space for showing and selling art. Replaced the garage door with salvaged glass windows and a glass door, added 2″ thick salvaged oak wide plank flooring, added more windows and a main entry door on the side, put in a wrap around deck, added barnboard and sheetrock to the walls for hanging art. We even found a great room divider: the original front desk from a landmark hotel in Rockland, Maine. It has a glass countertop with display case visible to the gallery and storage cubbies on the studio side where I keep my canvases and other supplies.

The studio portion has plenty of light with the floor to ceiling windows. My easel is located in the Creativity & Future Projects area–a perfect place to paint. The main display area runs from the Wealth area to the Fame area to the Love area. In the Wisdom & Knowledge area I have a display of 9 paintings. The bagua can be overlaid on them so that each painting corresponds to a feng shui position. Interestingly, I have found that paintings in the Fame area and the Love area of this 9 painting grid have sold best. Within the entire gallery, the Wealth area also has been a great location and paintings placed there do not stay with me very long.

What does your studio look like?

18 Comments

Filed under Architecture, ART, Creativity & Future Projects, Feng Shui

DREAMY DAYBEDS

This ultra hip day bed is from Carol Gregg for red egg.

This ultra hip day bed is from Carol Gregg for red egg.

I love the idea of a daybed…lounging around eating bonbons, mid-day trysts with my dashing lover, catnaps on cushions in wintertime with a cup of cocoa…daybeds conjure those fantasies as well as others I’ll keep to myself, thank you. This one by Red Egg designer Carol Gregg has made me drool for some time now. For some other ideas for more practical uses and less luxurious versions, check out this post at Ohdeedoh.com.

2 Comments

Filed under Feng Shui Home, Interior Design

BE LIKE EINSTEIN: SLOW DOWN & TAKE A NAP!

Photo from Wiki.

Photo from Wiki.

Einsteinwas famous for taking naps and the solution to his Theory of Relativity came to him while he was dreaming. We may not all be geniuses, but, we just might discover the solution to our own problems while we are focused on taking a hike instead. Slowing down and making yourself a priority is not being lazy: it’s a step towards being a successful, grounded, and productive professional. Learning how to set healthy boundaries is key.

SETTING HEALTHY BOUNDARIES

1) Put yourself at the top of your own to-do list. If you are constantly expending energy and not adding any fuel to your tank, sooner or later you’ll run out of gas. You’ll have nothing to give to your significant other or your children and you’ll certainly have nothing to give to your career. Taking care of YOU is your top priority!

2) Saying “no” to others is saying “yes” to yourself. What does saying no mean? Don’t always be available to take on the tough assignments or work overtime on the holidays. Don’t automatically reach for the doughnuts just because someone brought them in to work and you don’t want to hurt their feelings. Don’t come into work when you have a contagious cold that others will catch. Caring for yourself, you will have more to give to others.

3) Protect your ch’i (energy). Don’t take on other people’s negativity. People tend to dump their problems and vent their worries on others who allow them to do it. We end up feeling drained while they walk away feeling lighter for unburdening their load on us. Spreading harmful gossip is another energy zapper. Focus on work and taking care of yourself and avoid all energy vampires.

4) Turn on your answering machine. There, I said it. I give you permission to not answer your phone. Whether at work or at home, you have the power to slow down your responses. You might want to let people know–or not–that during the hours of this and that you are not available. Think of how much easier to get your work done if you have a solid chunk of uninterrupted time? You’ll sleep better at home if you stop accepting phone calls from friends or colleagues at least two hours before your bedtime.

4) Leave work at work. It’s a good idea to decompress from the stress at work before you begin interacting with your family and friends. Develop some little routine that becomes your own individual “ritual” to help you make the transition from work life to personal life. Your ritual will be your own. The most important thing is to allow yourself at least 20 to 30 minutes at the end of work to let go of the corporate dramas and get your mind back in touch with your life and what’s important to you. After all, you’re not only a professional. You’re a member of a family,and, you have other interests besides what you do for a living.
Don’t you??!

1 Comment

Filed under Dreaming, Feng Shui, Healing Energy, Health & Fitness, Self Help